Christmas Hijinks

So, Friday was Dante’s birthday, and given that he just turned three, he didn’t really have that lengthy of a wish list. Pretty much the only thing he specifically asked for was to go to Isaac’s for supper. Love that kid. 😉 Anyway, as we’re packing him into the car to head back home after supper, he announces that, “Now, we go home, put on our pajamas, and get ready for Christmas!” Cute, huh?

We decided on Saturday to follow through with that: The get ready for Christmas part, specifically. We ran out to Wal-Mart to pick up a new artificial tree, since we chucked our old, mangy one last year. After a brief flirtation with a pre-lit (and over-priced!) tree, we decided to go with a regular one, which was half the price, and after all, “We have all those lights at home, anyway.” We bring it back home, put Dante down for a nap, and start to move furniture around in the living room to accommodate the new tannenbaum.

That’s when we discover the wall behind our Futon was starting to fall apart. Old, painted-over wallpaper was peeling away from the mildewed plaster. A quick visit from my mom (quick house-repairer extraordinaire!), a bucket o’ bleach, and a tub of ready-to-use spackle later, and we’ve got the wall fixed, and the tree is on its way to being set up.

After completion of the tree, we rifle through the boxes of decorations looking for the lights. A brief exchange follows:

“I can’t find the lights!”
“Um…You sure you brought all the decoration boxes down from the attic?”
“They were the only ones there!”
(insert attic rummage here)
“I can’t find the lights!”
“Told you.”

It’s at this point that we recall that we chucked the lights (read: half-burned out, tangled-up messes of wires and broken hard plastic bulbs) in addition to the tree last year. (sigh) The upside is that this led us to purchasing these nifty new LED lights that are brighter than fabled direction-pointing stars, have the life expectancy of a twinkie crossed with a cockroach, and I think if they pushed just a little bit harder in the R&D department, could actually generate electricity on their own. When these puppies turn on, you can’t help but stand there and go, “Ooooh!” Of course, part of that may be a bad reaction to the eggnog you just quaffed, but you need to take that up on your own with your stomach.

So, as you’re decorating your own domiciles this holiday season… Um, I really wanted to wrap this up with a nifty, pithy saying that would be quoted on the blogosphere for decades to come, but I got nothing. Sorry. Uh, Merry Christmas?

–Jeff

One Reply to “Christmas Hijinks”

  1. This classifies as a good christmas story… the only thing better would have been if the leg lamp you ordered had actually arrived via carrier pigeon at the moment you discovered the wall… mmm, this eggnog is good!

    Merry Christmas?… I mean… Merry Christmas!

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